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The Shmooze dilema: Dignity vs. $2 Martinis 4

In February, I posted an article entitled Club Bouncer Egos. Well the club I was referring to is an after work bar in Toronto called Shmooze. A girl I know through a friend had a bad experience at this same club and shared her experience by writing an article to a Toronto Newspaper (The Metro). ...

I saw you on the TV! 2

The Security guard that works in my building is quite the character. On multiple occasions this man has confronted me in a huff, steam coming out of his ears because he’s mad at something I’ve done. But every single time he does this, about 30 seconds later he’s perfectly fine with what I have done. ...

Any read is interesting on the crapper 5

It’s always nice to have something to read when sitting on the John. Due to the lack of reading materials in my bathroom, I’ve noticed myself lately reading the back label on the Shampoo bottle. It’s interesting to read the directions on the bottle of Herbal Essences. It reads: “Massage into wet hair and indulge ...

Chinese men’s penises not inferior 3

Contrary to popular belief, Chinese men’s penises are no smaller than those of westerner’s according to a recent Hong Kong study. The average length of their flaccid penises was 3.33 inches, which compared favorably with similar studies on other men overseas. Germans have average lengths of about 3.4 inches, Israelis 3.27 inches, Turks 3.07 inches ...

Great outdoors 10

I returned home last evening from a weekend up north where the beautiful weather allowed me to escape from the city to a cottage and hike along Canada’s longest footpath, climb a 220 meter ski hill by foot and by Jeep, toboggan down the ski hill in a recycling box, cross a suspension bridge and ...

George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard 4

George Costanza’s Tips for Working Hard 1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they’re heading for the cafeteria. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they’re ...

Humans blindly indulge prepared food 6

Humans are an interesting species when it comes to food. (Don’t worry, I’m talking in third person here; I don’t consider myself to be another species; although some may disagree). When it comes to food, humans will blindly indulge food that has been prepared for them subconsciously ignoring the ingredients of said food. I have ...

My Last Words 6

As everyone is already aware, the Pope has passed away this weekend. According to an account published in an Italian Newspaper, the Pope’s last word was “amen“. After reading this, I wondered what my last words would be, so I put together a top 5 list. Vote for your favourite. 1. F#ckin A 2. Latez ...

Toronto’s skyline ranked 10th in world 5

Toronto’s skyline was recently ranked 10th in the world by Emporis Here’s how some other cities ranked along with their population: 1st – Hong Kong (Population 6,787,000 in city) 2nd – New York city (Population 8,115,135 in city and 21,796,124 in metro) 4th – Chicago (Population 2,869,121 in city and 9,549,014 in metro) 7th – ...

Bush thanks Dad for creating Osama, Saddam 1

… I came across this article today, very entertaining. BUSH THANKS DAD FOR CREATING OSAMA, SADDAMHopeful Current Columbia Policy Will Create Future “Enemies”Full Story CRAWFORD, TEXAS – Responding to soaring approval ratings following Operation Iraqi Freedom, President George W. Bush called his father, former President Bush, and thanked him for building Sadam Hussein and Osama ...